Another month has gone by. It's hard to come up with blog topics about sports when you're not watching any. It's also hard to not flip on ESPN when I'm traveling and I crash in my room at night, but I've been good so far (ok, I have read through the sports pages of the free papers, but that's all).
But I am having a moment of inspiration in the midst of my insomnia, and have been thinking about what we do in the name of love. Yes, this is related to sports, or have you never claimed to love your sports team(s)? I know I have said that I "love the Steelers". I have worn shirts that say "Luv ya Lions!" when in college at PSU. And what I must feel for the Pirates is either a form of love or Stockholm syndrome... And yet, when we proclaim love for our teams, we almost immediately forfeit rational thought. There can be no room for another team in that sport, else we would be practicing sports bigamy. We defend our love against all threats, much as we would our partners of children. We live and die by their successes. We say outrageous things and make asinine claims - all because of the love we claim to have for our teams.
And for what? A team cannot love us back. We may feel joy at our teams' triumph - but they cannot do more than make a statement of thanks for our support. We may despair at their failures - but the teams go about their business regardless of our feelings. It's a one way relationship. A crush. The unrequited love that so many poets waxed on about in the 19th century. We martyr ourselves for something that cannot love us back in any tangible, fulfilling way. We're left with all of the pain of watching our loved teams fail exceeding the pleasure that comes from the relationship. And still we fight for that love, we hate their opponents, we invest our emotions and time and money, and we are cannot receive the full value of that investment except perhaps fleetingly during the moments of victory.
If this seems rather depressed, it's because that's how I feel on this sleepless night. I think I could have replaced the word "team" in that preceding passage with any number of things. I could have picked "political party". I could maybe have picked something job related, though I find my job is quite rewarding and not a good fit. What I really feel tonight is that I could insert the words "faith tradition". Let me explain.
I was watching a webcast of the Upper New York annual conference of the United Methodist Church. My wife's a pastor - I had a legitimate reason to do so. It was like watching C-SPAN, only without the rules of order. Today, they were debating a number of petitions regarding the church's stances on homosexuality. And I was struck at how many people stood up and said some version of "Because I love this church so much, I cannot support anything that would be good for gay people" It was rarely that blatant, though there were a few people who came close. But they all talked about how they would exclude a whole portion of the world from the church "in the name of love". Just as I have proclaimed a hatred of Baltimore or Cleveland for love of Pittsburgh, they proclaim exclusion of homosexuals for love of the status quo of tradition and the words of white, European men from over a thousand years ago at a council in Nicaea. [Spare me the "the Bible is the Word of God" shtick for now - they may have been words from God or Jesus, but they were heavily edited, redacted, and spun for the benefit of politics and power.] And there is little rational thought that I have discerned in these statements. It is my view that a church that wishes to grow and remain relevant in the world while actively excluding parts of society is hypocritical at best and deliberately hurtful at worst. And that says nothing about the church's harsh treatment of clergy who wish to include those people in communion and community. Because these people proclaim love for the old ways, they reject new paths for growth without discernable rational thought, and so goeth the Church.
I was stuck in Cleveland a few weeks back while trying to get home from an event in California. And I wouldn't stop making horrid statements about the town to Allyson. I made those statements because of my "love" of the Steelers. And when I finally opened my eyes to see that the people in that town were nicer than many of the people I had encountered in any other town I'd traveled to recently (such as Newark, NJ), I realized that I had been cheating myself. It was a moment of growth for me - I realized that I was depriving myself of a fulfilling experience for love of a sports team that couldn't offer the same fulfillment. I wonder if the deniers of equal rights in the United Methodist Church would experience similar growth if they let go of the things they do in the name of love?
Friday, June 10, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
Winning doesn't equal justice
It's been a month since my last post, and a crazy month at that. Travel, classes, and the myriad number of hats I wear all seem to conspire to make life challenging in April and May every year. But I still love what I do, even if it means 16 hour days (like the one I'm about to have).
I do have two sports related thoughts to share, however, so without further ado:
1) I slipped a little last week. On a three hour drive home from the airport, having dropped Allyson off on Easter Sunday to visit family for a week, I was tired and decided to bite the bullet and turn on my satellite radio to listen a little to my Pirates playing the Nationals. As usual, the Pirates lost, and in their usual boring fashion – so boring that the announcers were discussing their rally "bunny ears" and singing the bunny hop in the booth while flirting with an intern. I give them credit, they've had 18 years in which to hone their comedy routines during losing baseball seasons and yet they still suck at it. But, the thing that really struck me is that, for the first time in a long time, I wasn't really pulling for one team over the other - I was just enjoying the game. Maybe 18 years of losing means I don't care about the Pirates as much any more, so I'm not about the claim victory over my sports addiction, but it was nice to turn off the game and not feel disgusted with them or myself.
2) Last night, as you are no doubt aware, President Obama announced that Osama Bin Laden had been killed by US forces. While waiting for the press conference to start, the announcer people were talking about how the chants of U-S-A were going strong at Ground Zero and near the White House. It recalled for me the story that the chant of U-S-A originated at the 1980 Winter Olympics with the USA Hockey team. Then, we were channeling our hatred of the CCCP into our passion for sport, but now, it almost feels like we were channeling our love of sport into the death of this decidedly evil man. America loves winning - just ask Charlie Sheen - but it feels awkward to me to now be celebrating the death of Bin Laden. I don't feel like we've won anything - thousands of American men, women and soldiers have died in the pursuit, and all of that is vindicated by the killing of one man. I slept on it before I wrote this post, and I still don't feel as though we've been made whole. I'll leave you with this final thought:
From the Oxford English Dictionary:
winning |ˈwini ng |
adjective
1 [ attrib. ] gaining, resulting in, or relating to victory in a contest or competition : a winning streak.
justice |ˈjəstis|
noun
1 just behavior or treatment : a concern for justice, peace, and genuine respect for people.
• the quality of being fair and reasonable : the justice of his case.
• the administration of the law or authority in maintaining this : a tragic miscarriage of justice.
PHRASES
bring someone to justice: arrest someone for a crime and ensure that they are tried in court.
vengeance |ˈvenjəns|
noun
punishment inflicted or retribution exacted for an injury or wrong.
The definition of justice doesn't feel like it applies to this situation, but winning and vengeance sure do.
Shalom,
Todd
I do have two sports related thoughts to share, however, so without further ado:
1) I slipped a little last week. On a three hour drive home from the airport, having dropped Allyson off on Easter Sunday to visit family for a week, I was tired and decided to bite the bullet and turn on my satellite radio to listen a little to my Pirates playing the Nationals. As usual, the Pirates lost, and in their usual boring fashion – so boring that the announcers were discussing their rally "bunny ears" and singing the bunny hop in the booth while flirting with an intern. I give them credit, they've had 18 years in which to hone their comedy routines during losing baseball seasons and yet they still suck at it. But, the thing that really struck me is that, for the first time in a long time, I wasn't really pulling for one team over the other - I was just enjoying the game. Maybe 18 years of losing means I don't care about the Pirates as much any more, so I'm not about the claim victory over my sports addiction, but it was nice to turn off the game and not feel disgusted with them or myself.
2) Last night, as you are no doubt aware, President Obama announced that Osama Bin Laden had been killed by US forces. While waiting for the press conference to start, the announcer people were talking about how the chants of U-S-A were going strong at Ground Zero and near the White House. It recalled for me the story that the chant of U-S-A originated at the 1980 Winter Olympics with the USA Hockey team. Then, we were channeling our hatred of the CCCP into our passion for sport, but now, it almost feels like we were channeling our love of sport into the death of this decidedly evil man. America loves winning - just ask Charlie Sheen - but it feels awkward to me to now be celebrating the death of Bin Laden. I don't feel like we've won anything - thousands of American men, women and soldiers have died in the pursuit, and all of that is vindicated by the killing of one man. I slept on it before I wrote this post, and I still don't feel as though we've been made whole. I'll leave you with this final thought:
From the Oxford English Dictionary:
winning |ˈwini ng |
adjective
1 [ attrib. ] gaining, resulting in, or relating to victory in a contest or competition : a winning streak.
justice |ˈjəstis|
noun
1 just behavior or treatment : a concern for justice, peace, and genuine respect for people.
• the quality of being fair and reasonable : the justice of his case.
• the administration of the law or authority in maintaining this : a tragic miscarriage of justice.
PHRASES
bring someone to justice: arrest someone for a crime and ensure that they are tried in court.
vengeance |ˈvenjəns|
noun
punishment inflicted or retribution exacted for an injury or wrong.
The definition of justice doesn't feel like it applies to this situation, but winning and vengeance sure do.
Shalom,
Todd
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Opening Day (sniff)
I love lots of sports, but baseball has always had a special place in my heart. I can't put my finger on it - I'm sure some of it is the fact that games are during the summer, that there's strategy for every person on the field, that I made some of my best sports friends charting pitches for my high school baseball team, but mostly it's 3 hours away from stress. I always remind people that it's still America's favorite pastime, not necessarily the favorite sport.
So, now we face opening weekend, one of the most optimistic times in the sports year. Even my Pirates are still tied for first place on opening day, though it doesn't usually last long. I'm sad today, because I know they are playing, and I know I've given up watching or better yet, listening to games, which is still my favorite way to be a fan short of being there live. I also think I'm the best kind of sports fan with baseball. Yes, I do hate the Yankees (and to a lesser extent, the Red Sox), for legitimate reasons mind you, but most teams I can just appreciate, because most teams struggle to put a good product out there year to year, and unless you have a $200 million payroll, it's hard to guarantee a winning record every year. I can enjoy talented pitchers and hitters, I can marvel at the beauty of a no-hitter or the difficulty of maintaining a .300 batting average over a long year. I love that game, not just one team.
There is part of me who wonders if part of it is because the Pirates have been doormats for so long. But the Rockies have had some great runs, which included my first ever attendance at a playoff game in any professional sport, and it hasn't diminished my love of the game (in fact, I think it rekindled it some). Plus, I still love baseball mythology - the 57 game hitting streak, the Iron Man, the perfect hitter embodied by DiMaggio and Gwynn, the amazing variety of pitchers from Randy Johnson to Tim Wakefield. I look back at the past two months and realize that while football tends to bring out the worst in me as a fan, baseball brings out the best.
It will be a long summer without you, baseball. Even if the Pirates lose 100 again this year.
So, now we face opening weekend, one of the most optimistic times in the sports year. Even my Pirates are still tied for first place on opening day, though it doesn't usually last long. I'm sad today, because I know they are playing, and I know I've given up watching or better yet, listening to games, which is still my favorite way to be a fan short of being there live. I also think I'm the best kind of sports fan with baseball. Yes, I do hate the Yankees (and to a lesser extent, the Red Sox), for legitimate reasons mind you, but most teams I can just appreciate, because most teams struggle to put a good product out there year to year, and unless you have a $200 million payroll, it's hard to guarantee a winning record every year. I can enjoy talented pitchers and hitters, I can marvel at the beauty of a no-hitter or the difficulty of maintaining a .300 batting average over a long year. I love that game, not just one team.
There is part of me who wonders if part of it is because the Pirates have been doormats for so long. But the Rockies have had some great runs, which included my first ever attendance at a playoff game in any professional sport, and it hasn't diminished my love of the game (in fact, I think it rekindled it some). Plus, I still love baseball mythology - the 57 game hitting streak, the Iron Man, the perfect hitter embodied by DiMaggio and Gwynn, the amazing variety of pitchers from Randy Johnson to Tim Wakefield. I look back at the past two months and realize that while football tends to bring out the worst in me as a fan, baseball brings out the best.
It will be a long summer without you, baseball. Even if the Pirates lose 100 again this year.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
If you aren't cheating, you aren't trying...
I heard this old cliché again the other day, and it just now hit me as a flash of insight. I was talking with one of my best friends tonight and he reminded me of the significant difference between little kids playing sports and when sports become more competitive. We were talking about how professionals often have to psych themselves up by comparing their upcoming games with epic battles, the other teams as enemies to be hated and hurt and punished, while younger kids are just trying to have fun (usually), learning fundamentals (hopefully), and being cheered (and not booed) by the fans/parents. When these things are cast as life and death struggles, it's no wonder that athletes are pushed toward eye-gouging in scrums, performance-enhancing drugs, and trying to circumvent the rules in general. Furthermore, does it not explain why in the week before a rivalry game even the fan bases become violent toward each other?
Still, I must be healing or changing in some way. I was discussing an opportunity to work with another college to develop some advanced high school geology programs similar to the one I administrate here at Oneonta State. I asked him which other colleges were interested, and one was a campus of the Ohio State system. That I didn't immediately scowl, spit, and/or vomit in my mouth felt like a victory of sorts.
On a personal note, it's been a trying couple of weeks. I've had setbacks with my emotional health related to my surgery and some increased job responsibilities, my wife has had some professional setbacks that still look to be wholly unfair, and I'm so far behind in grading that it's approaching the level of cruelty to my students. In my despair, I actually tried to cave and watch some basketball last weekend, only to find that, for whatever reason, our local CBS affiliate was off the air - so I'm still 99.44% sports pure (I may have looked at some games passing by a bar or two more slowly than usual). I do miss the mindlessness that can come with enjoying a neutral game, it could have been comforting this week.
Still, I must be healing or changing in some way. I was discussing an opportunity to work with another college to develop some advanced high school geology programs similar to the one I administrate here at Oneonta State. I asked him which other colleges were interested, and one was a campus of the Ohio State system. That I didn't immediately scowl, spit, and/or vomit in my mouth felt like a victory of sorts.
On a personal note, it's been a trying couple of weeks. I've had setbacks with my emotional health related to my surgery and some increased job responsibilities, my wife has had some professional setbacks that still look to be wholly unfair, and I'm so far behind in grading that it's approaching the level of cruelty to my students. In my despair, I actually tried to cave and watch some basketball last weekend, only to find that, for whatever reason, our local CBS affiliate was off the air - so I'm still 99.44% sports pure (I may have looked at some games passing by a bar or two more slowly than usual). I do miss the mindlessness that can come with enjoying a neutral game, it could have been comforting this week.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
March Mad
OK, I'm just going to say it, I've been trying desperately to sneak peeks at the NCAA tournament. We went out to eat - I kept fighting the urge to "use the bathroom" to walk through the bar at Cheesecake Factory. This morning, I "accidentally" turned on CBS, but for some reason, Dish didn't have the CBS feed out of Binghamton active, there was just a message saying "We know it's not working, Don't Call Us" (nice customer service there, by the way)
I don't think I knew how much I liked looking at the brackets and dreaming of possibilities, of having games switch to the exciting finish (or switch away from the game I wanted). I'm frustrated by it, and have been so close to just saying something that is probably anatomically impossible to do, and watch the games anyway.
But I've been good. I haven't said anything bad about a Duke fan in at least a month, which is a record for me, and I haven't watched anything, not even when I was in San Francisco and I could have used it (see my previous blog).
I don't know if it's growth yet, but it's at least still abstinence. Guess that's something.
I don't think I knew how much I liked looking at the brackets and dreaming of possibilities, of having games switch to the exciting finish (or switch away from the game I wanted). I'm frustrated by it, and have been so close to just saying something that is probably anatomically impossible to do, and watch the games anyway.
But I've been good. I haven't said anything bad about a Duke fan in at least a month, which is a record for me, and I haven't watched anything, not even when I was in San Francisco and I could have used it (see my previous blog).
I don't know if it's growth yet, but it's at least still abstinence. Guess that's something.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
What a week...
I am starting to realize one positive thing that sports brings to my life - an outlet for stress. It seems ironic to me, because when my teams are involved in an important game, or they are about to lose a game they should have won, I am very stressed. But sports are also therapeutic to me, and this time of year is the best example.
Right now, I am aware that the NCAA Men's Basketball tournament has started. I hear rumours, but I don't really know who's in the field except for the top seeds, which NPR mentioned on Monday (guess Pitt held it together this year). But the first week of the tourney was always a great time for me - I loved going to a sports bar on Thursday morning (skipping classes when I was a student) and just watching games. I made friends, drank some beers, and ended up with a sore butt from 12+ hours of sitting at a bar, but my god it was nice to get away. There was some peace in watching those games, rooting for upsets, and not truly caring too much about the outcome. The stakes get higher in the later rounds, but the opening round was and is my favorite two days of the sports year. They start tomorrow.
The other thing that happens this time of year is spring training in baseball. I love baseball. I love the strategy, I love being in a ballpark, I love the sounds and smells, I love passing time. It is still our nation's favorite pastime, not our favorite sport, and I love it for being just that. Going to the hall of fame reminds me of memories of being in the stands, dancing around between innings, enjoying a hot dog and a beer, and knowing that most of the time, one game doesn't make a season. It's 3 hours away from life with your friends. Yeah, I've been to some games where stupid fandom got in the way, but most of the time, it's zen - a place away from the world where you can ignore everything else going on.
I found myself missing these refuges this week. It was a hard week, full of conflicts and putting out fires, late nights sending emails til 3 and 4 in the morning trying to understand and prevent flare ups, and the international tragedy of the Earthquake and Tsunami, which unfolded live during one of those late nights. All of that took place in San Francisco, a different timezone, and while I'm still recovering from my surgery - which I can tell you took a physical toll. The stress of last week has ripped up my stomach, my sleep patterns are all over the place, and I'm so exhausted. I can't begin to describe how physically and emotionally exhausted I am. It's not all about this past week - it's been happening for a few weeks now, but last week didn't help. I almost fell asleep while teaching this morning, and I did fall asleep in my office between classes. I came home and slept for 4 hours until dinner, which is the only reason I'm awake now (that and my stomach is full of acid again - stupid pain pills)
I miss my sports right now. It is a physical absence in my life right now.
I am hoping that through this journey I can learn to extract the stress that comes from being a passionate fan of certain teams from the refuge that sports otherwise provides me. I want to enjoy and not stress over games, and I need to learn that skill. But I haven't yet. And so March Madness comes, and I won't be watching. I hope one of my teams doesn't win...
Right now, I am aware that the NCAA Men's Basketball tournament has started. I hear rumours, but I don't really know who's in the field except for the top seeds, which NPR mentioned on Monday (guess Pitt held it together this year). But the first week of the tourney was always a great time for me - I loved going to a sports bar on Thursday morning (skipping classes when I was a student) and just watching games. I made friends, drank some beers, and ended up with a sore butt from 12+ hours of sitting at a bar, but my god it was nice to get away. There was some peace in watching those games, rooting for upsets, and not truly caring too much about the outcome. The stakes get higher in the later rounds, but the opening round was and is my favorite two days of the sports year. They start tomorrow.
The other thing that happens this time of year is spring training in baseball. I love baseball. I love the strategy, I love being in a ballpark, I love the sounds and smells, I love passing time. It is still our nation's favorite pastime, not our favorite sport, and I love it for being just that. Going to the hall of fame reminds me of memories of being in the stands, dancing around between innings, enjoying a hot dog and a beer, and knowing that most of the time, one game doesn't make a season. It's 3 hours away from life with your friends. Yeah, I've been to some games where stupid fandom got in the way, but most of the time, it's zen - a place away from the world where you can ignore everything else going on.
I found myself missing these refuges this week. It was a hard week, full of conflicts and putting out fires, late nights sending emails til 3 and 4 in the morning trying to understand and prevent flare ups, and the international tragedy of the Earthquake and Tsunami, which unfolded live during one of those late nights. All of that took place in San Francisco, a different timezone, and while I'm still recovering from my surgery - which I can tell you took a physical toll. The stress of last week has ripped up my stomach, my sleep patterns are all over the place, and I'm so exhausted. I can't begin to describe how physically and emotionally exhausted I am. It's not all about this past week - it's been happening for a few weeks now, but last week didn't help. I almost fell asleep while teaching this morning, and I did fall asleep in my office between classes. I came home and slept for 4 hours until dinner, which is the only reason I'm awake now (that and my stomach is full of acid again - stupid pain pills)
I miss my sports right now. It is a physical absence in my life right now.
I am hoping that through this journey I can learn to extract the stress that comes from being a passionate fan of certain teams from the refuge that sports otherwise provides me. I want to enjoy and not stress over games, and I need to learn that skill. But I haven't yet. And so March Madness comes, and I won't be watching. I hope one of my teams doesn't win...
Sunday, March 6, 2011
One Month without Sports
So, as promised, a reflection on the first month I can remember when I didn't follow any sports.
Overall, it's hard to describe how I feel about it. I'm a little angry - I don't know how the Penguins or Nittany Lions are doing, if Pitt is holding up in the Big East, or even if the NFL has decided to have a season next year. I know that in a few weeks time, March Madness will be starting, and I won't be streaming coverage for the first time in years. I once dropped a college class to attend a tournament game, now, I won't be watching a single game.
I'm also sad, because I realize how unbalanced my life has become. I can't tell you how many times I've sat down and started to punch in ESPN on the TV, only to stop a digit or two in to the effort and remember that the channel is blocked. It was so much a part of everything - I graded while listening to sports, I wrote lectures while watching games, I would rest my brain by watching my favorite teams.
So life has changed. But growth is slow. I know if I started up again, I'd be back in my "enemy-hating" mode right away. I still glower at Michigan and Ohio State flags and think mean thoughts about the people flying them. I want that to change, but it's going to take time. Still, there have been some small changes. I am at least aware of how often I have disproportionate responses to other peoples' desire to wear their teams colors. I bite my tongue much more often when I see someone with a Duke shirt or Yankees hat. I am trying to remind myself that in the end, I have felt horrible being on the receiving end of that kind of vitriol, and I can be a better person than that.
I have found that it has been a very spiritual journey for me. Perhaps it's because it's been coupled with my recovery from my spinal fusion surgery, but I don't think so. You see, I think I've become so accustomed to using sports as my emotional security blanket that I have been out of touch with my own values. Remembering those values, and realizing that my life is not in harmony with those values, is sobering. I wonder how often athletes see that themselves. I've wondered if that disconnect comes from having to treat the other competitors as enemies rather than merely competitors; treating games and matches as battles and wars; giving all of yourself to a single cause rather than living a life of balance. I think it's what we've seen from players who have public embarassments or crimes - Tiger Woods, Ben Roethlisberger, Michael Vick. I distinctly remember hearing Tiger talk about being out of balance. If my one month journey is even a shadow of what he felt, then I would imagine his shame may have been at least about how he ever let himself get so out of touch with his values. I wonder how many politicians who have made their careers about beating the other team are still in touch with their personal ethic. How many businesspersons? How many of any of us, when we contrive to make someone our enemy in the name of motivating ourselves, lose touch with who we really are? Us against the world is too much to endure alone. "Us with the world" seems so much healthier, balanced, and less stressful.
So, as I enter month two, I know I have a long way to go. I know I'm beginning to miss some of my favorite things as a sports fan. I know I still feel hate well up at the sign of the "enemy". But I know that there is something better out there for me. A way of viewing sports as a fun diversion rather than a personal investment. But more importantly, I know that I have learned from sports that creating a competition can be a great motivator for success, and I think I am coming to learn that it's unsustainable. I'm curious about your thoughts and feelings about the idea. Those are mine for now.
Thanks to all of you who have been following this. Feel free to share it with others - I don't plan on putting ads up or anything, I just feel good being able to share, and give you space to share back. I tried to change a few settings to allow postings without signing in, but you can always leave notes on facebook or twitter.
Overall, it's hard to describe how I feel about it. I'm a little angry - I don't know how the Penguins or Nittany Lions are doing, if Pitt is holding up in the Big East, or even if the NFL has decided to have a season next year. I know that in a few weeks time, March Madness will be starting, and I won't be streaming coverage for the first time in years. I once dropped a college class to attend a tournament game, now, I won't be watching a single game.
I'm also sad, because I realize how unbalanced my life has become. I can't tell you how many times I've sat down and started to punch in ESPN on the TV, only to stop a digit or two in to the effort and remember that the channel is blocked. It was so much a part of everything - I graded while listening to sports, I wrote lectures while watching games, I would rest my brain by watching my favorite teams.
So life has changed. But growth is slow. I know if I started up again, I'd be back in my "enemy-hating" mode right away. I still glower at Michigan and Ohio State flags and think mean thoughts about the people flying them. I want that to change, but it's going to take time. Still, there have been some small changes. I am at least aware of how often I have disproportionate responses to other peoples' desire to wear their teams colors. I bite my tongue much more often when I see someone with a Duke shirt or Yankees hat. I am trying to remind myself that in the end, I have felt horrible being on the receiving end of that kind of vitriol, and I can be a better person than that.
I have found that it has been a very spiritual journey for me. Perhaps it's because it's been coupled with my recovery from my spinal fusion surgery, but I don't think so. You see, I think I've become so accustomed to using sports as my emotional security blanket that I have been out of touch with my own values. Remembering those values, and realizing that my life is not in harmony with those values, is sobering. I wonder how often athletes see that themselves. I've wondered if that disconnect comes from having to treat the other competitors as enemies rather than merely competitors; treating games and matches as battles and wars; giving all of yourself to a single cause rather than living a life of balance. I think it's what we've seen from players who have public embarassments or crimes - Tiger Woods, Ben Roethlisberger, Michael Vick. I distinctly remember hearing Tiger talk about being out of balance. If my one month journey is even a shadow of what he felt, then I would imagine his shame may have been at least about how he ever let himself get so out of touch with his values. I wonder how many politicians who have made their careers about beating the other team are still in touch with their personal ethic. How many businesspersons? How many of any of us, when we contrive to make someone our enemy in the name of motivating ourselves, lose touch with who we really are? Us against the world is too much to endure alone. "Us with the world" seems so much healthier, balanced, and less stressful.
So, as I enter month two, I know I have a long way to go. I know I'm beginning to miss some of my favorite things as a sports fan. I know I still feel hate well up at the sign of the "enemy". But I know that there is something better out there for me. A way of viewing sports as a fun diversion rather than a personal investment. But more importantly, I know that I have learned from sports that creating a competition can be a great motivator for success, and I think I am coming to learn that it's unsustainable. I'm curious about your thoughts and feelings about the idea. Those are mine for now.
Thanks to all of you who have been following this. Feel free to share it with others - I don't plan on putting ads up or anything, I just feel good being able to share, and give you space to share back. I tried to change a few settings to allow postings without signing in, but you can always leave notes on facebook or twitter.
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About Me
- Todd Ellis
- I'm passionate about educating everyone about weather and the climate. (P.S. Climate change is not a belief, but a documentable scientific phenomenon) Plus, I'm an avid sports fan, who has sworn off sports for the year. That ought to be interesting...